You've done the maths on how long it's been. You've read the threads, you know the phrase dead bedroom and the fact that it has a community the size of a small country, and at some point tonight you started looking for somewhere to be wanted by somebody. That's an extremely common route to a page like this one. What follows is what an anonymous text room actually is in that situation, what it isn't, and the one question nobody else can answer for you.
The question, once
Is this cheating? We're not going to answer that for you, because the answer depends entirely on the agreement you have with your partner, and only the two of you know what that is. Some couples would call an anonymous text conversation nothing at all. Some would call it a serious breach. Plenty of people have never discussed it because it never came up.
What we will say is that the question is worth actually thinking about for five minutes rather than deciding by default at midnight. Is sexting cheating is the page that works through it properly: what different couples land on, the questions that clarify it, and what tends to happen afterwards. Read it if you haven't. Then decide, and it's your decision. We're not going to lecture you and we're not going to cheer you on either.
What a text room does in this situation
The honest version is small and specific. It gets you talked to like someone who's wanted. That's the thing that goes missing in a sexless relationship, and it's not really about sex. It's about being looked at. A stranger who is interested in what you're describing gives you an hour of that.
It's also the lowest-stakes format there is. No photos required, no meeting, no phone number, no account, nothing installed, nobody within a hundred miles of you. The whole thing exists in a browser tab and stops existing when you close it. Compared to almost every other way people handle this, the exposure is minimal, and that's a real part of why so many people in long relationships end up in text rooms rather than anywhere else.
What it doesn't do
It doesn't fix the bedroom. Nobody has ever solved a four-year drought by getting a compliment from a stranger at 1am, and the relief is short. There's a version of this that becomes a pressure valve which lets you avoid the conversation you actually need to have with the person you live with, and if that's what's happening, you'll know, because the chat stops being fun and starts being a routine.
It also isn't counselling and it isn't a support group. The room is an adult chat service. People there will flirt with you. Some of them will be sympathetic about your situation and most of them didn't come for that. If what you want is to talk the problem through at length with someone qualified, that's a different kind of service and you should go find one.
The version where you're both in it
This is the part people don't expect. A meaningful number of couples in exactly this position use a chat room together rather than separately, and it works better than it sounds. Not as an open relationship, and usually not with anyone else involved at all.
What it looks like: the two of you in the same room, typing to each other from separate devices or reading a stranger's messages together and reacting. It gets past the specific problem where the two of you have said everything you're going to say to each other in a bedroom and neither can find a way in. Writing is a different channel. People type things they'd never say out loud to a partner of fifteen years, and sometimes that's the thing that restarts a conversation. Couples chat covers how two people share a room without it going sideways, and long distance sexting works fine at a distance of one hallway.
If you want to try that, the useful move is to sext each other rather than a stranger. How to sext and the examples page both work as a starting point for a couple who have gone rusty, and the vanilla end of the room is where most of it lands. Nothing about it requires either of you to develop a kink.
What the room is actually like
Mixed, and a lot older than people expect. There is a substantial crowd of adults in long relationships in there, and a substantial crowd of single people, and nobody is required to declare which. Most conversations don't get into anyone's domestic circumstances at all, which is either a relief or a disappointment depending on what you came for.
People are generally not looking to hear the details of your marriage. They're looking for a conversation. If you lead with the situation you'll get some sympathy and then a lull. If you lead as a person who's interested in them, you'll get further. The over-40 room is where a lot of this crowd ends up, and the small hours are when they're around.
The practicalities
Free, anonymous, adults only, no signup and no email address. Nothing is stored on your device that you didn't put there, though if you're thinking about who else uses your computer, that's on you to manage and keeping a separate identity covers the basics.
One rule that's absolute: share what's yours to share. Your partner's photos are not yours to post, whatever the state of things at home. That's ban-worthy every time and the rules are enforced by real moderators. If you want to know what the service itself can see, that has its own page. And if honesty about being in a relationship is the part you're weighing, married chat deals with that directly.